Monday, June 9, 2014

I'm no John Green.

as you might have gathered, I'm writing a book. I've been quiet about it here for no other reason than because my words have been channeled in a different direction.

sometimes it feels more like I'm throwing words at a page hoping some will stick. even more often than that, I find myself sobbing my way through yet another John Green novel and wondering, why can't I write like this? 

{in case you're curious, comparison is a bitch. steer clear, loves}

I've been trying to figure this book out. I've spent hours pouring over the FAQs for indie publishing on Kindle. see, the big dream is to be picked up by a publisher. to have someone read your words and fall in love with the characters and the worlds you've invented. but that isn't the only road.

and so I'm in the process of becoming an indie author. just writing those words is terrifying. in the best possible way.

when you're a writer, terrifying is what you sign up for. when you're a writer, don't expect little things. because if you do, you will get little things. if you walk in with your eyes open and your fingers twisted in that half-prayer, half-nerves kind of way, you're going to get big things. 

even if they aren't the big things you imagined.

sometimes I sit back and I laugh at the very thought of what I've undertaken. I understand that moment when Gideon stared into the eyes of the Son of the Most High from the bottom of a fear-stained threshing-floor and said, me? but I'm no one. I'm the least of the least. 

except I'm not. I'm sitting at my computer, wielding words that have turned into holiness by mistake. this wild magical book, this tale of portals and spilled blood and triumph and a song that breathes magic back into drained-dry bodies. and I'm realizing more and more that I am writing the essential story.

I'm no John Green.

and that is the very best thing.

{this book is closer than you think. did you know it has a fan page on Facebook? find me there!}


  1. Amen to your thought on comparison, Rachel. ;) Steering clear of it though is easier said than done.
    Brava on becoming an indie author! Truly! I'm excited to keep up with all the news on your upcoming debut. I know firsthand how terrifying it is. I kept my venture into indie-publishing a complete secret from but a few handful of people till my book was available for purchase I was so freaked out. ;)

  2. I admire your bravery on dozens of levels. Writing is an act of bravery. Publishing, the most brave of all. I applaud you and look forward to reading more about your journey. Thanks for linking with Unforced Rhythms.

  3. THAT IS THE VERY BEST THING!!!!!!!! yes yes yes!!!

  4. looking forward to read your book! xx

  5. I am so thrilled for you and excited and ministered to by your words when I visit here, Rachel.

    Thank you for writing. <3


I look at you and see all the ways a soul can bruise, and I wish I could sink my hands into your flesh and light lanterns along your spine so you know there's nothing but light when I see you. :: Shinji Moon