Wednesday, September 14, 2011

life step

this whole life can seem like a theater dream.

you know, the bad kind.

the kind where hands push hard on your back and you stumble

stumble out onto a fully lit stage with naught in hand and strange clothing on your back, if any at all.

and they tell you dance but there is no familial music and no steps to guide your feet.

and they tell you speak but you don't know the words.

you don't even know who or what you're supposed to be. 

and you freeze and stumble and bleed and weep and all you want to do is run


until you can't see this strange place anymore ever.

and the comes the laugh. the hearty mocking gafaws that echo through your heart and cause you to freeze and stumble and bleed and weep all over again.

and there is no run.

because your legs have turned to liquid stone and you have nothing anymore.

and then you wake up. and it was all a dream. 

the sigh of relief falls into canter with the beating of your still unsure heart.

but then the news clicks on. death and destruction and ache and break and death not life and dark not light and nothing is as it should be anymore.

hands pushed you into this glaring place and you don't know what o do.

nothing in your hand. nothing on your back.

and then they say dance. 
but He gives the music and holds your feet against His bleeding nail scars and you move together.

they say speak. 
but He gives you His words and you speak. 
a mouthpiece for a mouth of peace. it's a symphony, 
this life of you and He together.

alone it's a kurfuffle of empty noise.

together is a dance.
 a step. 
a life. 

no fear. no stone. no ice.

life love warmth freedom courage.

all this life in Him. 

{linking with my dear emily for this broken song of love}


  1. I think you should compile all of your blog posts into a book and sell it. xD I'd buy it!

  2. Oh gosh Rachel. I think I say this every time I comment on one of your posts, but this was beautiful. Truly. <3

  3. So lovely!! I agree with Qui, I would buy that book!!

  4. nice...very well written it is a dance and we follow the lead...i am familiar with the running though....

  5. Thank you, especially, for the image of the child's feet on top of her daddy's. I'm so grateful for the love and help of our Heavenly Father. Bless you.

  6. thank you for letting me know about the comment thing. :)
    Your blog is flawless, love. Don't ever doubt that for a moment. You breathe inspiration into my life on a daily basis.


  7. Nicely written! I am new to your blog, but I saw your comment over at Yours Truly on "Spot the Blogger" post. I am a young teenager who sketches too. Here is my art blog:

  8. Very nicely written. You really neeed to write a book or something! You are an *amazing* blogger, who puts so much feeling and emotion into your words, and those words need to be published! Everyday, as you type away at that key board of yours, it is like you are typing away at the words my heart needs to know right at that moment. And I know I always comment on your posts, but this one was absolutly breath taking!
    --Sara Beth

  9. Mmmm...Rachel, this is incredible.
    The words, the flow, the pictures, the words again...

    Thank you for pouring out a bit of your heart to the 'page' today to share this.

    I'm moved.

  10. Beautiful, as always. I love your descriptions. I agree with Sara Beth. You need to write a book.

  11. This so beautiful. Know both feelings. Love the photos that you used to illustrate it.

    kateri @

  12. Mmm...I needed this today. I currently feel like I'm on a professors telling me to dance and speak and do all sorts of things, and I feel so lost and unable... "I don't know how to do this, I don't understand, you're asking too much..." and it's all too hard, you know? Too much pressure, under too many eyes. *sigh* but He'll help me and give me words and give me knowledge and guidance...and He'll help me through this exhausting dance, yeah? Yes. "Courage, dearheart." Thanks for lifting up my soul today.

  13. i love how raw, how brave, this post, dear rachel....

  14. you have captured a part of His heart in this piece here, I think.

  15. this is beautiful! your heart inside of His... perfectly!

  16. Oh how often I feel like this! Thank you for the vivid, beautifully-worded reminder that I simply need to speak God's words, dance His dance, play through His hands.

    Beautiful words, dear Rachel.


I look at you and see all the ways a soul can bruise, and I wish I could sink my hands into your flesh and light lanterns along your spine so you know there's nothing but light when I see you. :: Shinji Moon