sacred seeker

{via pintrest}

i am on a search. 

i am learning this thing called sacredness.

to be honest, i have never understood what it means. not really. 

the dictionary: 

devoted or dedicated to some deity or religious purpose. 

consecrated. 

regarded with reverence.

i grew up in church. in a Christian family with the fear and knowledge of Christ Jesus in my heart and soul. 

i know this word

the concept of sacredness

backwards and forwards

but only on the outside.  

because i never dared to look inside.

and i am almost twenty-one. 

and only just now i have begun the seeking of this internal mystery within external familiarity. 

i think i have forgotten that my Jesus is a gentleman. 

never entering where He is not invited. this God-Man does not carry a battering ram, forcing down my walls. 

this Rabbi is gentle. easy yoked, lightly burdened. it is nail-scared Palm atop clenched little-girl fist, slowing working open fingers with caresses of love and patience. 

stones come down one by one. these petals cannot be torn open. they must be done with care and pain and agonizing slowness at times

but oh, His sacred beauty within.

and so i seek Him. i seek to taste that which is sacred.

fingers gently tangle with the King of Kings. the sovereign One refuses to let this weak child wander alone. 

we take this treasure map together. and walk this path toward eternity. 

slow steps

hand in Hand. 

from now until the beginning of May 2012, i have embarked upon a study: discerning the voice of God by priscilla shirer. i do this in company with a small group of women from our church, led by my dearest mother. 

this walk is new to me, this concept of truly being still and hearing Him speak is familiar but oh so foreign. 

each week, i will be pouring His voice here. 

expect Him here.

 {pray for me.}