woman ablaze

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i am the girl on fire. 

i am the woman ablaze.

or at least, i want to be. i want to walk a path once dim and watch it glimmer as the lights flicker into being and line the steps so that others can come after and not trip on the stones. 

i love the moon and the stars 

almost more than the sun.

it's a softer light, not blinding. i can gaze upward when the moon shines gentle and whispers hope better than when the sun leaves spots behind my lashes, even when they're closed. 

and that's what i want to be the world. soft light pointing to the Son that comes in the dawning, not a second sun that comes where it shouldn't and speaks too loud and too blinding for the world to understand. 

there is beauty in the soft light. beauty in the candlewick as it flickers in the night, the softest glow that illuminates the eyes and the heart and the soul. the Word was penned by light of wax and string dipped and twisted together, gentleness on fire. 

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because we're all about the megaphone these days. all about the fist-banging to startle the sleepers and frighten them from their daze. 

but don't you rather it when a hand gently touches your shoulder, a soft shake to rouse you and guide you from pillow to daylight? there is a time and a place for the brightness that overwhelms, and there is a time for the caress of tenderness. 

we forget. yes, He toppled tables. but there was soft weeping, too. 

oh, Jerusalem, Jerusalem. 

how I longed to gather you to Me....

i am the girl on fire. 

i am the candle ablaze. 

and oh, i long 

to be the moon that heralds the Son. 

last hope's gaze

i am secret.
i am silent.
i am sometimes forgotten, even by myself.

because i'm too eager to slice a vein and pour my heart out to another, leaving myself parched with life flowing away and yet, i find myself still wondering why i'm so weary.

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i think it's because i feel selfish when i take, when i turn my eyes inward instead of gazing outward at those around me. because there are broken ones, a thousand of them, and i'm just one.

but i'm still one. and i need to not forget that so easily.

and by One, i am never forgotten. 

why is that we are so able to stretch out fragile arms to those around us, and forget about that person who wears our skin and breathes our air? that one of a kind suit of flesh and blood tangled around soul and spirit and sanctified? 

i think it's okay to be woman. it's okay to taste the sting of death and come out the other side alive. it's okay to not be strong all the time. it's okay to rely on another's arms to bear you up because your legs have turned to shaking, and your heart has turned to thudding. 

you don't forget the face of the person who was your last hope.

// suzanne collins :: the hunger games //

sometimes, that last hope seems impossible to even find anymore. 

but it's there, i promise you.

and when you see it, you never forget His face. 

safe and sound

have you ever reached into the fire for gold with dross pouring over your fingers
as it burns away flesh and earth and leave behind sacred?

have you ever dared to take a flower petal in your fingers to study the lines

the ones that spell life and sun and Light and little things?

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these are the things we forget to remember. that Light erases darkness and flower veins spell mystery, that value is found where money is missing and silent touch is often more important than too many words? 

don't you dare look out your window, darling

everything's on fire

 the war outside our door keeps raging on

 hold onto this lullaby

 even when the music's gone

// safe and sound :: the civil wars //

it's about seeking Him where He may be found, in all sacred corners that are most often forgotten. because if He wrote in the dust, why can't i?

 it's about holding on to music when everything burns, and all that's left is you and Him and the lion's song, ringing clear in the night, crying

see, I am doing a new thing.

all things are made new, dearheart. 

i'm spinning in these dustmotes, cape in hand and candle in the other. 

i'm closing my eyes and leaping into crystal pools. it's His country i seek. i'm safe and sound, drowning in His glory.