Saturday, July 3, 2010


I miss Peru. A lot.

This is my second year not going on a missions trip over the summer, and I gotta say, it's killing me.

My friends that are on the trip have been keeping me updated, but it's breaking my heart to be here in the United States instead of serving Him overseas these two weeks.

Tonight was particularly hard. I was driving in my car, and a song started playing on my iPod.

I'm finding myself at a loss for words...and the funny thing is, it's okay.

I sat behind the wheel of my car, and I cried. When I got into my parking lot, I sat in my car, and just let the song and the worship wash over me. Memories flooded me.

Little brown-skinned children reaching up to touch my face, and washing the long, black hair of little smiling girls, white-specked with lice and caked with muck.

Performing the drama over and over and over again for crowds of people, feeling tears spring to my eyes with every raised hand proclaiming the name of Jesus Christ.

The Lifehouse Everything Skit, acting out the truth of what Jesus did in my own life and heart. The hugs, the tears, the worship services, the FUAGNEMs...

And so I sat in my car, pushed back my seat, and fell face down on the steering wheel. I wept and I sang, allowing the Holy Spirit to flood my soul.

Word of God, speak. Won't you pour down like rain, washing my eyes to see Your majesty? To be still and know that You're in this place...please let me stay and rest in Your holiness!

And that was when I heard God speak to me.

"You don't need Peru or Guatemala to be with Me. I'm here with you right now, my precious daughter!"

That is the power of my God.

1 comment:

  1. Rachel

    The power of the truth you write about does not erase the emotional struggle that can reappear. Similar to the breadth of God spoken to you about the Peru or Guatemala locations, you are precious to Him in Dixon no matter what else occurs!

    Being creative like you (though not as capable of expressing the depth that you can), I ache when you ache! Love Daddy


I look at you and see all the ways a soul can bruise, and I wish I could sink my hands into your flesh and light lanterns along your spine so you know there's nothing but light when I see you. :: Shinji Moon