Monday, June 17, 2013

our Father :: glory

{via pinterest}
yesterday was Father's Day. and i meant to write, i did, but the crush of the do and the laughter and the ice cream and pizza and s'mores in the glow of a low-setting sun overtook my inspiration.

there were hugs from the man of God that raised me, and from the man of God that gave me his son as my love and calls me "daughter," and from the man of God who looks at our tiny evenstar and calls her daughter.

and i inhaled family instead, and oh, it was so good.

and then i woke up this morning with sunrays on my cheeks and some strange realization brewing soft in the core of me. because on Saturday night, our pastor spoke familiar words that the whole room of worshippers repeated back to him, not just because he asked but also because we couldn't help it, really.

our Father
hallowed be Thy Name. 

and these words, just those two short phrases, had lodged themselves in my mind and hummed at me in the dawning. i've felt the stirrings my entire life, the pull from the place where my faith journey started where nothing was personal. it didn't feel right even to my little-child heart who grew up in the church.

why call Him Father and then be afraid to touch Him?

and i've been chided more than i can really comprehend for daring to touch the spiritual, for being so irreverent as to reach out my fingers toward His robe and even just brush the fabric. and i use that strange word so often :: sacred. and the intensity i feel scares even me sometimes, because what is there that pushes me in such a powerful way?
{via pinterest}

He does. 

and i reach up my fingers with a kind of hesitant bravery, that kind of courage that groans in the silence when we know what must be done, but there is a shakiness somewhere down deep. and it's overwhelming and we know that it might lead to something else...something bigger....maybe something  that would hurt.

our Father, 
glory. Your name is glory.

and so i grasp, tight, and i'm lifted onto a Lion's back and the roaring laugh reaches my hesitating soul. fingers in His mane, we leap to salvation, and i am so close i can feel His heart. and oh, it is a thunderstorm and a tidal wave and a comfort and a peace.

it is all of these, and a thousand things more.

and i beg Him to write His name as deep as it can go, because i don't want to forget. and i want to throw back this strangely terrified warrioress heart and howl glory at the coming moon, early seen at twilight, and radiant in the darkness.

:: my Father. 
Your name. 


  1. Dear Rachael
    Why on earth shouldn't we touch our Beloved, ride on the back of the lion of Judah and live our life in the Loving Embrace of our Heavenly Pappa! Living in Jesus and," Christ in me, my hope of glory", is what it is all aout!!
    Much love

  2. Oh wow. This s power, and beauty, just like (and because of) Hus name.

  3. His name is glory. Love this. I want to reach out and touch him back as he touches me...

  4. Your writing makes me smile this deep smile from within because you give me permission to taste the freedom that is within Him.

  5. i beg him to write his name as deep as it goes....smiles...yes, dare to reach, to touch...ride the lion---not all will understand and that is...ok.

  6. How sweet to celebrate our heavenly Father this Father's Day season, as well, as our earthly Fathers.


  7. It is the holy mystery, how He can be both at the same time, isn't it? And we can't explain it in words, but we feel it when we ponder, don't we? The immense love and intimacy at the same time as awe. No other elicits those feelings that are so in contrast to one another.

    Such beauty here, Rachel. Thank you.


I look at you and see all the ways a soul can bruise, and I wish I could sink my hands into your flesh and light lanterns along your spine so you know there's nothing but light when I see you. :: Shinji Moon