things that might make my life better.
things that might simply take up another spot on a shelf and never be used, though i will say
i have that.
some things are bigger though. some are wants that drive us to our knees, blurring the line between want and need.
it isn't about material things that we want.
sometimes, wants are soul aches that strum a chord of longing that only we can hear...us, and those who long, too.
we all want.
my wants are vast. i have my Christmas lists and grocery lists and reading lists and all those things i want.
and then i have the list that only He and i share, the one where He must hold me as i read, as i shake with sobs in wanting.
i'm learning to want Him first.
to want His will when it hurts, to want His timing when it takes so long.
i'm learning to be still, and know, and wait for strength renewed and heartcries fulfilled.
i'm learning these words:
i will wait.
i'm learning to ask for the right things. for His will. for His place.
taking Him at value. that His promises are sure
and His grace is sufficient.
of all my wants, He is my need.
Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love.
Where there is injury, pardon.
Where there is doubt, faith.
Where there is despair, hope.
Where there is darkness, light.
Where there is sadness, joy.
O Divine Master,
grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled, as to console;
to be understood, as to understand;
to be loved, as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive.
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.
— St Francis of Assisi