Saturday, November 12, 2011

in which i am His // and me

i started this blog differently.

rather, i didn't write the traditional "hi, my name is..." post at the very beginning. i started out to be a private poet.

in fact, i never have written one of those posts. at first, it didn't feel right to me to talk about myself or share random scraps of this and that.

i have a bio page which talks about me. but it's just crumbs on the plate that is me.

this is one of those times when i wish i could open my soul's door to you -- just to let you peak inside and get a glimpse at this watercolour wallpaper which paints a picture of the real Rachel.

with her mother's middle name and orange circles in her eyes 
with a new-found obesession with dreadlocks and searching for greater soul

because that's the real me.

am i strange because my favourite kitchen item is this teal and white ceramic bowl, all vintage and old? i have no idea where this bowl even came from, how it managed to find its way into my tiny culinary corner. but it did. and it's my favourite. 

 i can read the same book over and over again; i can find different things within each ink jot and somehow love it more. i've done that with Shakespeare and with Rowling.

i love the touch, the feel, the aroma of the printed word. i will never buy an eBook. not ever. 

i didn't use to write in lowercase letters all the time. in fact, i was a perfectionist with capitalization and punctuation. i'm recovering from that. 

{via pinterest}
i'm discovering the sacred now. it's a walk, and it's a painful one. but i'm letting Him drive now, and it's a better journey. 

i'm intensely claustrophobic. even sleeping bags freak me out. if i can't move my feet, or my head can't turn, then i'm bound to panic. 

i love vanilla. and cinnamon. and spices that tantalize my lips and tongue. 

i love wooden spoons and wooden bowls and ice cream with them both. 

do you see me better now? 

these are just bits of me. i wish i could paint you a picture. i don't know if you'd see what i see. i think i like that, though. 

i learning to love my rosepetal smile and my watercolour eyes. 

i'm learning to walk, that it's okay to break. 

i'm learning Him

and in the process 
i'm learning me.  


  1. This is great, Rachel!

    Thanks to you I'm looking forward to joining that splendid blog party. =)

    I enjoyed getting to know more of a glimpse of your lovely self. =)

  2. Hi Rachel....I like your Dramatic Elegance Blog.

    I like the picture of you in your elegant, purple dress...I love purple! I love your blog button with a bowl full of berries...I love berries! I love ice cream too...and wooden spoons and bowls!

    I love to read...and I love the feel of a book, and also it's cover.....and I don't know if I could enjoy an e-book or not.

    I like to write poems too. Some are serious and some are silly. I wrote a poem for my blog today. Come for a visit if you can.

    (Abigail's Grandma)

  3. i love this! yay for revealing yourself! i'm so proud of myself for being part of this change and "finding yourself"... (i.e., lowercase letters.) ;) haha. i love it. i'm such a huge advocate of people knowing themselves and learning about themselves. and obviously i'm a huge advocate for being real. and writing real. and raw. be that or be nothing. it's all or nothing. it really is.

    oh, and i'm claustrophobic too. sleeping bags are terrible. and e-books are a miserable invention. wooden bowls and spoons are the best. (partly because i don't like things that clink, partly because they're just SO COOL). and vanilla and cinnamon are probably two of the best smells/tastes ever. :)

    keep daring to reveal yourself, lovie. it's beautiful.

  4. I like real books too.. it's just not the same if you read with ebooks or on a tablet!!

  5. Beautiful post. I'm so glad that you gave us a glimpse into the real you. That's what this blog party is all about, and I'm glad you let that come through. It's those intimate, strange, and seemingly "unimportant" details that create the very important construct of our unique selves. You're beautiful. :)

    Thanks again for sharing, and for linking up. I appreciate your creativity and openness!


I look at you and see all the ways a soul can bruise, and I wish I could sink my hands into your flesh and light lanterns along your spine so you know there's nothing but light when I see you. :: Shinji Moon